Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Children


I have noticed lately that Pepper has been different.  She is a little more quiet and a little more angry.

I feel there are a few reasons for that, but I wanted to think/write on comparing kids or putting one child above another.


She took this picture of herself!  LOVE this girl!




I hate to say it, but it is really easy to brag on Sedona.  She is able to figure stuff out quickly, she remembers stuff amazingly well, she excels at most stuff she does. She is doing school work a grade above her own.
Her talents are out there for all the world to see.

Pepper is different than that.  Her talents are not so easily seen.  She is a "normal" student.  She does well in school, but has to work to figure stuff out.  She is funny, but she has to be comfortable with you to show that side of herself.  She doesn't have a need to show off, but wants to do her best and wants to share when she is proud of something. She is a little spunky and not so quick to help when asked all the time, but is an amazing worker when you find what she is interested in doing.

I found that I would say stuff about Sedona to people and not brag on Pepper as much.  So we, as a family, have decided to make sure Pepper gets her cup full.  I complement her more often.  I make a point to tell people what a great kid she is where she can hear me.  I let her know of any improvements she has made and not so quick to point out mistakes.


A few years ago!

Her smiles the past few weeks have been so beautiful.  She has the CUTEST little smile when she is proud of herself and I am so happy to see it more often.

 Sometimes I forget how smart Pepper is because of the differences in age between the two. I expect Pepper to do the stuff (chores, attention span) that Sedona does.  I need to remember they are very different! I am working on it.

I hope I can continue to be a good mom and not have one child feel they are better or more loved than the other, but that is a tricky and fine line some times.

Anyone have any suggestions for me?

PS: it is easy for me not compare Wheeler because he is so much younger and so different!


cleaning house


Another Post on the dang cleaning of my house!

But this one is actually a little more productive.  I am actually making a difference in my home.

I am doing a two box method and leave on the shelf.

So that is my own term if you didn't guess.

Starting with the bookshelves I used this technique.

I have two boxes.
1. Give Away/Sell
2. One Year

In each box I put the books.  The books that are a YES KEEP stay on the shelf.  The One year box will be taped closed, labeled One Year Books, and put in the silo.  After the one year mark if I can't remember which books are in each box I give it away with out opening it.

I have done my back room bookshelves, parts of my middle room, and parts of my kitchen.  I am loving this!  The house feels more open, I am finding more time to clean it, and finding that it takes less time to clean!

The items that are left on the shelf will be gone over again---really do I need 12 books on green house gardening when I don't even have a greenhouse?

Like I said in my last post I have gotten ride of about 4 trash bags of stuff--and boxes of 1 year give away items.  Honestly I have almost already forgotten what is in most of those boxes!  My Giveaway/Sell boxes will be kept until a later date--IF I have not had a yard sale--then by a certain date they are all going to the local thrift store.  I am so excited to do this in my scary room.

A few things I have learned--I have a really hard time with certain items--bathroom stuff, crafts, picture frames, and other small things.  I have a hard time letting them go.  I will have to have a buddy when I go through that stuff.

Something I have learned about myself. When I get in the mood to get rid of stuff I have to box it and seal it so I don't go back and pull it out.  I have also learned that my need to have STUFF isn't as great.  Before I could go into the dollar store and buy 50 things, only to have them end up in the scary room in a box forgotten about.  Now I can pass up pretty much everything unless I know I have a need for it within the next  month.

I am reading minimal living blogs and they are helping a lot.  I also love how the Amish "Decorate" with useful items.  They have their platters hang on the wall ~ So pretty.

Well I have typed enough on this--next time I am hoping to do some before/after pictures of my purge!

Funerals

In the month I have attended a lot of funerals.
I am not sure what is happening, but I have been involved (attending/helping) with at least five funerals.

I like funerals, but I HATE that they happen after the person has passed away.
What a wonderful celebration of life.  Does the person who has passed on know how many people they touched?  Do they know all the small stories that are told on how they effected someone they might not have even known about?

The SMART way to do a funeral is when someone is still alive and able to enjoy it.  I understand this is tricky, because who really knows when we will die, but honestly if I know I am going to pass away I want my funeral when I can still attend it.

I always ask Lucas who he wants to speak at his funeral if he were to die.  He never answers me.  I just get a "I don't want to think about it."

After every funeral I attend I think  "Who would I want to speak at mine, and what would I want people to say?"
I didn't really think about it yesterday after attending a funeral, but that is because I was totally enthralled with an experience I have never had before.


I was able to sit and eat with a couple of Amish couples.  I have been reading about the Amish in both romaticised writing and about their way of thinking and life.  I know they are books and can't honestly grasp the true life of daily living, but I am LOVING learning about them.

I am inspired by their way of thinking about the individual and how being modest (not in dress, but in all of lifes aspects) is most important.


There was about 6 Amish couples attending the funeral since the man who passed away was a driver for them.  Since they don't drive, but so much of their work and grocery shopping is far away, they hire drivers to take them places.  Lucas drove the Amish for a while when he was working construction with them.

They all sat boy/girl/boy/girl at the table, but you could tell they were all married (Amish men stop shaving when they get married).  I sat in front of the couple on the end and asked if I could sit with them.  The couple right in front of me were very talkative and friendly, the couple next to them-not so much.  Mary Ann and Luis talked and answered my questions and I volunteered information about myself since it seems they are not ones to openly ask questions.  The man sitting next to Mary Ann was her brother and he was very quiet. His wife, though I didn't get her name, seemed like she wanted to engage in the conversation,  but she was pretty shy so I mostly talked with Mary Ann and Luis.

We talked about where they were from, where I was from, how many kids they have (a 1 year old and a 2 year old), talked a little religion--discussed "wards/communities/congregations".  We talked about their families and traveling (since they both were from other states).  It was amazing.  I just want to be a fly on the wall for about a week and see how life works for them.  They all were very kind, nice, and open.

One thing I have been trying to achieve since I started reading these books is to live more simply.  It is amazing to me how calm life is when I don't have 1 million things to choose, decide, all within the hour I wake up.  I have a long way to go, but I have removed about 4 bags of trash, and about 20 boxes of stuff from my house in the past few weeks---and I am just getting started!