hello

So this 40 day thing is awesome--but I am not following it.

I know strange how this is working out.

I am picking and choosing each day what I want to do and then doing it. However I am doing the Love Dare almost 100% and it helps.

One reason it helps is not only because it is focused on making a more Christ like marriage, but because it helps me focus on doing things that have been bringing me down.

For example many of the days it tells me to do something that will make your spouse feel your love. -- So I clean the house, which in turn makes me feel much more calm and happy. Today in fact before even reading what the love dare "to do" item was--I had already done it! It is great.

Plus the biggest lesson I am learning is giving love without expecting anything in return, and learning to see the things he does as things he does to show me he loves me.
Does that make sense?
For example, today he trimmed the apple trees. In the past I would have thought.
"Great--Does he expect me to make applesauce, apply pie filling and dried apples with the apples we will get? He knows I hate picking apples and dealing with worms and half eaten apples--and cleaning them up off the grown--that is just what I need another thing to do this fall!"
But until I sat down I didn't think any of those things...I only thought.

"That tree looks much better. I hope Lucas enjoyed that and I hope that gave him a break from the boring repetition of what his life is. Now maybe we will get a few more apples that I can reach instead of watching all the apples at the top of the tree get eaten by the birds!"

I am reading a book right now written for a Mormon couple, but ANY and ALL couples would benefit from it. It is called "For All Eternity" By Dr. John Lund. (Spelling?)
I am also reading another book—including “Making peace with yourself" and "The Freedom from Depression Workbook." I am not depressed, but this book helps me not go there. It helps me keep things in perspective and know what I need to work on.

If you are struggling with your marriage--I suggest "The Love Dare" and "For all Eternity"--overall happiness I suggest the other two.

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Since my dad passed away I haven't been able to read books that were more than simple story lines--and I gave up almost all my Self-help books, but these ones have been helping a lot.